I was reading Lysa TerKeurst’s wonderful blog and came across this about her husband: “Three weeks out of the month he loves me and loves to do whatever he can to help me do ministry. One week out of the month he simply puts up with me and my bout with the Princess Must Scream syndrome.”
Now this compels me to ask: if she, or any of us, have a keen awareness that hormonal fluctuations make us less kind and sweet during certain times, why do we let fly with those temper tantrums? Once we become aware that the reason for reacting with tears or anger or frustration has nothing to do with the situation, we no longer have an excuse for reacting that way.
If the children’s bedrooms are relatively messy all the time and it only drives us to screaming at them during that one week of the month, then it is NOT the mess that is causing us to lose it, it is our hormones. So why take it out on the kids?
If something MAKES you feel a certain way, it would have to cause that response every single time. Onions for example, make some people cry- they have no choice, it is the body’s natural reaction to the irritant in the onion. (by the way, even this can be changed. Cut up your onions as close as possible to a stream of running water. The oil from the onion will be attracted to the running water instead of the moisture in your eyes) What an all-purpose, helpful blog this is! Now back to our regularly scheduled topic…
Situations and other people do not have the power to unhinge us unless we give it to them.
The bottom line is, it is never any situation that makes us feel in any particular way. We chose how we feel. To say “you make me soooo mad!” is to give our power and control of our life to someone else. Take your power back and make your own decisions about how you are going to feel.
You see, our emotions are like currency, the currency that purchases our future. If you can guide and control your emotions, you can use them to make positive deposits into
- your relationships
- your sense of self-worth
- your attitude about your potential
- your decisions about your future
The first step to overcoming emotional ups and downs is the knowledge that you CAN control them. You do not have to fall prey to every grumble, fear, or worry that pops into your head. There is a moment of space between the situation and your response. In that moment, you can choose whether you want to whine and yell, thus damaging your relationships, or whether you want to communicate in a way that encourages understanding and growth.